Stop Fighting Your Success!

Author: Justina Vail, PCC CHt – 2/27/13

Have you been striving for years to make your acting career turn into something tangible? Have you found that, no matter how much marketing you do, how many acting classes you sweat through, and how many great headshots you send out, your career seems to be stuck? And do you ever wonder, What am I doing wrong?

If that sounds familiar, you’re not alone. I can’t count how many actors I’ve coached, at every career level, who come in telling me they’re doing all the right things, yet their vision of the future has been just that—a vision of the future. It hasn’t had the chance to become a reality.

Why? Very often the reason we get stuck is that we’re not aligning with what we want.

Creating the career you want requires making smart choices and taking specific actions, and it also has to make sense in your internal world— where your beliefs, thoughts, states, and intentions live. If those inside elements are fighting all the actions you’re taking on the outside then you’ll probably have a hard time making things happen. Even a belief you’re not aware of can shape what comes back to you. If, for example, you have a subconscious belief that you aren’t interesting enough to be a series regular yet you really want to book one, there’s disagreement. There’s conflict between the belief and the goal. Your behavior in auditions and meetings will then be affected by that conflict, your reactions will keep backing up the belief, others will sense it, and you probably won’t book the series regular!

Certainly, it’s not a black and white world and some people who feel undeserving still have huge careers. Yet in my experience with many busy, working actors, I’ve found that if they aren’t aligned with the good that’s already happening to them it either doesn’t last or they just can’t enjoy it, so they’re back to being stuck in a life they don’t want. However, when they free themselves from limiting thoughts and beliefs, and begin to align themselves with their vision, they usually move on to deeply fulfilling and sustainable careers.

So, stop fighting your own dream and start aligning with it. Ask yourself, Am I in conflict with my own vision of the future? If the answer is “yes” – and trust me it will be somewhere – then take time to become aware of your own deep beliefs, your habitual thoughts, and your go-to moods. Make sure that they’re working for, not against, your career. Have them all agree on your vision for the future. Yours is a unique and important dream and you’re the only one with the power to step in and claim it.

© 2013 Justina Vail • All Rights Reserved

This article is also on BackStage

9 Responses to “Stop Fighting Your Success!”

  1. Kelly says:

    Wow, what an excellent, thought provoking and timely article, thank you Justina.

  2. Rich B. says:

    Well said.

  3. Jeff says:

    Great article! One I need to remember as well. Simple, and so true!

  4. Mary Sarah says:

    Thank you for this. It is very grounding and empowering to realize that we can do something about our inner reality to align more fully with what we know we are capable of.

    • Justina Vail says:

      Yes Mary, I expect this is a big reason why life coaching has appeared in the world. We realize it’s not so much about what we do, but more about how we go about things and what the blocks and the resources are that make the outcome. I like how you put it; it’s grounding and empowering to know we can do something about it!

  5. Ingrid Moss says:

    Justina,
    As usual your articles are always so timely.
    Yes, in certain areas of my career I have
    been having internal conflict. Time to start working
    on changing that and finding ways to change those
    inner conflicts.

    Cheers,
    Ingrid

    • Justina Vail says:

      Hello Ingrid, lovely to have your comments as usual! I think about the human trait of inner conflict and have compassion for all of us. It’s something I believe we are beginning to really know how to resolve. And, just like conflict between two people, it’s all about making sure that both sides are validated, that no one is thrown out, and that the good in each side can be brought to a third, more powerful and integrated place. It’s such great stuff to explore and shift!

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